Let’s be clear. The customer is very rarely right. The misapprehension that companies should always give their customers what they demand, when they demand it, has been used to the advantage of many an arsehole over the past 5 decades. As a result, the relationship between customer and service provider in the 21st century is like that of a skilled extortionist and a powerless serf, with the customer wielding power like a giant baseball bat, ready to brain the unsuspecting salesperson with their skewed interpretation of The Consumer Rights Act 2015.
But this wasn’t the only nonsensical statement hammered into the public consciousness back in the day.
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day: No it isn’t. It’s the most useless meal of the day unless you are a growing child or an elite athlete. The notion dates from the 1950’s and was cooked up by the Egg Marketing Board in a bid to sell more eggs. These days breakfast is a Pain au Chocolat and a quart of sugary latte, specially designed for you to fall asleep at your desk at 3pm when your blood sugar plummets.
Form follows function: What does this even mean? This pretentious epithet is bleated by people who think they know something about design, but it still doesn’t explain why Polo Mints have a hole in the middle, or why the label on a bottle of Angostura bitters is 3 times too big for the bottle. Or why trainers are white.