Babies require more random crap for a morning in the park than most people take on a fortnight’s holiday

A new study published today shows that the stuff mothers take to the park for their babies would push the maximum baggage allowance on an international flight.

Claire Jamieson, mum of 14-month old Ruby, insists that every item is absolutely essential for her weekly picnic with her friend Gemma and Gemma’s 13-month old Aaron.  “I need nappies, wet-wipes, a bib, a Sippy Cup, a plastic plate, plastic spoon, jars of baby food, a camping stove, saucepan, gas bottle, blankets, laptop, spare Sippy Cup, more nappies, clean romper suit, socks, a spanner, woolly hat, box of tissues, more nappies, 5 litres of water, rubbish bags, organic string, more nappies, another Sippy Cup, orange juice, hand sanitizer, toilet paper, some bungee cords, Jimmy the Rabbit, Marty the Marmoset, emergency nappies, talcum powder and a cannula.”

We ask Claire what the spanner is for.  “I can’t remember, but there was a time last summer in the park where I thought ‘I wish I had a spanner right now’, and since then I’ve always brought one just in case.”

According to the study, picnics with babies generally consist of 3 hours of cleaning things up and retrieving dropped or thrown objects. Not much eating goes on for Claire and Gemma. “We usually eat the kids’ leftovers by scraping it off their bibs with a spoon, although I occasionally find time to grab a handful of grass and leaves from whichever tree we’re sitting under.”

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